Personal Finances in The Queer Community with Mike & River Nice

Oct 11

On this episode of Financially Naked: Stories from The Financial Gym, our host is Mike Poulin, Level 2 Certified Financial Trainer. He is joined by River Nice (they/them), founder of Be Intentional Financial LLC. River started their firm in 2019 after a career in the tech industry. They join Mike today to talk about all things queer finance and the unique challenges folks who don’t fit into government-issued binaries face within our systems. They highlight the differences in financial planning for the queer and trans community and provide helpful tips for folks in the community and their allies.

Podcast Notes

River became a financial planner 6 years ago. After working in tech, they wanted to pivot their focus to serving the queer community. Around that time, their partner was transitioning and had accrued credit card debt through the process. River helped her budget and make a plan to pay off the debt. Their partner asked, ‘who in the personal finance world is going to help a trans woman with credit card debt?’ which launched River into the business they have now. They took a job at a traditional broker to gain the experience needed and then left to start Be Intentional Financial.
They officially launched in 2019, without a concrete plan in place. They weren’t charging enough and trying to keep clients forever. They eventually leaned into the client’s feedback and adjusted their services. They now offer a 6-month one-on-one program or 3-month group coaching program.
River focuses on building the foundation of financial literacy to set folks up for future success. It’s about giving clients the information and teaching them how to apply it to their lives.

Planning for transgender folks’ finances:

Each person’s journey is different and will include different financial obligations. There are medical, legal, and societal transitions that can be made, and they all cost money. Some examples include:
- The medical costs for hormone therapy, surgeries, and any medications associated with the recovery. In addition to taking time off work for these things.
- Legal costs: name changes, updating all personal documents to reflect the new name. A new passport and driver's license all cost money.
- Societal transitions can include a new wardrobe, make-up, or laser treatments.

When planning a transition, River recommends a budget with a list of goals in order of priority.
One unexpected aspect of transitioning, or existing outside of the gender binary, when applying for life or disability insurance, premiums are affected by your gender. It’s weird, complicated, and depends on the insurance provider.

Queer Family Planning:

River has an entire workshop on this topic!
Planning a family can be expensive, and there are many paths to consider. In each path, there are options within the options.
Some employers in the US will help with IVF or adoption fees, as a benefit.
There are grants out there, specifically for LBGTQ families, or fertility support in general. It’s worth researching if this is a route you’re planning to go. In Philadelphia, where River is located, there is an organization called Philadelphia Family Pride that does this type of work. Learn more about them here!

Starting a family is only one part of the cost. Once the children arrive, there are ongoing costs. Mike in general recommends adding $2,000 on your monthly expenses once you have children when you’re planning ahead.

Estate Planning:

This is especially important with the uncertainty in the supreme court. There’s always a possibility they decide queer families are no longer valid legally on a federal level. It’s a scary reality, but one that’s important to be prepared for.
Take the time to make sure that you, your spouse/partner, and your children are all protected legally.

In addition to your assets, estate planning includes naming a medical proxy, determining who will care for your children/pets, and final wishes for your funeral or final memorial. You can lay all of that out in an estate plan.

Non-Monogamous Relationship Financial Planning:

Planning for ‘non-traditional’ relationship structures has its own logistical challenges. Most budgeting software isn’t designed to support a three-person household. There’s no universal checklist. It’s about really listening to the clients, figuring out where they are now, and where they see themselves in the future.
River has designed a budget template for a three-person household, which you can get here!
Having shared accounts for joint goals, and separate accounts for personal goals and purchases is an excellent strategy for polyamorous folks.

If you’re interested in working on your finances in a judgment-free zone, schedule a free 20-minute consultation today with The Financial Gym. If you want to work with River, you can learn more here!